The story of Esther and Xerxes is common to many people as it is one of the Bible stories told over and over again. It Is the story of a young lady who through her character and obedience, finds favour and becomes the queen of king Xerxes in place of Queen Vashti. Looking into their story, below are some lessons we can learn from them both

1. Esther was obedient. She was obedient to her uncle, she was obedient to Hegai who was in charge of her and her obedience paid off as she found favour and became the queen. Her obedience made her significant and it was her obedience that later saved her people from perishing. A woman who desires a positively exemplary home has to be obedient to God, her husband, parents and other authorities once it's not contradicting to the word of God and what she believes in.

2. King Xerxes was a man who knew what he was looking for and when he found Esther, he didn't hesitate to make her his. The Bible says he loved Esther more than all the other women that had come and he made her queen immediately. As we look forward to having homes in the future, it is important to spend time in prayer and with God, conversing with Him about what we want and what He'd have us do. This would save us stress of doing trial and error relationships and would make it more easy to recognize your partner when he or she comes.

3. King Xerxes was almost always seeking the opinion of others. As a king, it was important but there were some decisions he could have made himself. Some of the opinions others gave him led to problems and didn't help the situation. Even if we seek for the opinion of others, we should weigh it with what we believe and think of the consequences before carrying such out.

4. Esther had to save her people from the threat of Haman. When she heard, and after she was spoken to by her uncle Modecai, she ordered that she and her maids and those who served her to not eat but to pray and seek God's face as she knew the consequences of visiting the king without him asking for her. A woman knees needs to be close to the ground and her voice constantly heard in heaven interceding for her family and that concerns her. This also applies to men. Both men and women have to understand the importance of prayer and apply it to their everyday lives.

5. King Xerxes had anger issues thus it took a woman who had studied and understood him and was wise enough to handle him. Don't make assumptions in relationships. Know as much as possible the person you're building with, with hopes to spend the rest of your life with and when there are signs, don't ignore them.

6. Esther knew her husband's weakness and used it to her advantage. She knew he loved wine and when he was in good spirits he could do anything. Thus, she used it to her advantage. We shouldn't use our partner's weaknesses against them but use it in a way that would benefit both of us. Esther could have died thus, initiating another search for another queen but she used King Xerxes weakness to save herself, her people and her marriage.

7. King Xerxes had the habit of making decisions without thinking through. He was unwise in making many decisions which led to dire consequences. He made decisions without thinking through and for which when he had a rethink was too late or almost  too late. For example when queen Vashti was removed, when he gave Haman the authority to wipe out the Jews etc. As men and ladies, we are not to make decisions without thinking of the consequences and how it would affect not just us but every other person around us.