In
today’s society, it can be difficult to develop a healthy concept of
self-love but you have to love yourself before anyone else can.
self-love isn’t about being egotistical or arrogant, it’s about being
secure in your identity.
Sometimes believers think self-anything
is a sin but, when you learn to love yourself, you’re able to sustain
healthy relationships. If you’re insecure, no amount of love from your
partner will ever be enough.
A huge aspect of learning to love yourself properly is seeing yourself the way that God sees you.
He
loves us so much that while we were in sin, Jesus came and died for us
(Romans 5:8). So, no matter how we feel at times, we have to remember
that we were worthy enough for Him to give His own life. This truth
should empower you to value yourself.
We are significant to the
Lord, He made us joint-heirs with Christ! When you fully understand this
and recognize your importance, you’ll start to see yourself differently
and begin to love yourself inside out.
Here are a few practical tips to help you love yourself more.
Surround yourself with healthy people and community.
When
you’re determined to love yourself, it’s crucial for you to be around
others who love themselves and speak life consistently. If you’re always
hanging out with negative people, it’ll start to rub off of you.
Spending more time with those you admire can go a long way in gaining
self-confidence.
Enjoy your own company.
If you hate being
alone it could be a sign that you don’t love yourself enough. Now, you
don’t have to isolate yourself but solitude can rejuvenate you. This
could be as simple as taking yourself to the movies or going for a long
walk. Maybe you could take a class or do something you’ve wanted to do
but no one had any interest. This is YOUR time — do you!
Spend time with God.
Spending
time with God can look like different things for different people.
Maybe for you, it’s watching a teaching on YouTube, or journaling, or
maybe it’s taking a nature walk. Whatever you can do to feel more
connected to God and hear His voice.
You don’t have to wait for
Sunday service to get in the presence of God. Turn on some worship
music, pray, and rest in Him. Tell Him what’s on your mind and how
you’re trying to develop healthy self-love. There’s something about
knowing that the God of heaven and earth is with you, and His love will
spark your own.
Cherish what you have and who you are NOW.
This
is a big one! So many times we get caught up in thinking that soon
we’ll have this and one day we’ll be happy. We fantasize about the
perfect life scenario and we’re so fixated on that idea that we overlook
how blessed we already are. This leads to depression and makes it
difficult to love ourselves.
Make the very best out of everything
you have as it is right now. Be present and don’t forget to smell the
roses because life is so sweet! There’s nothing wrong with desiring more
but don’t downplay all that you do have. As you work toward the life
you want, take on the mindset of gratitude — it’ll make the journey that
much better!
It is possible to make your friends, family, and spouse happy and show them, love, without you knowing how to love yourself. You most times feel like you are slaving for them. One thing you need to know is that true love comes from within and it can never be faked.
Self-love is a lot of things but not Selfishness.
What is Self-love?
Self-love is a way of respecting yourself, appreciating yourself, and caring for yourself by doing things that will enhance your well-being. These things may be your physical habits, spiritual habits, social and work ethics but they must be done to enhance your inner peace.
It is when you do things that give you that inner peace and joy. When you self-love, you seldom act from a place of anger when you are with other people be it, friends or family and you can radiate this energy to everyone around you.
What is Selfishness?
Selfishness is being concerned excessively or exclusively, for oneself or one’s advantage, pleasure, or welfare, regardless of others.
From the above definitions, we can see that self-love is positive while selfishness is negative. So, let no one tell you that you are selfish when you are only trying to self-love. In case you are wondering why we are bringing this topic up again, it is because you cannot truly love others when you haven’t learned how to love yourself.
Love your neighbor as yourself is what the scriptures say in Matthew 22:37-39. There is no way you would love others if you haven’t loved yourself. When you have learned to love yourself, you make loving your partner easy because you will be able to communicate your needs to him or her.
Here are 10 ways you can choose to self-love.
1. Have a Daily Me Time
Why should we even call it Self-Love if you will not create time for yourself? You are a living entity in this noisy world, it is only very important to spend some time with yourself, every day to stay out of the noise and just be. Try this and you will feel the calmness within you.
2. Have a Great Morning Routine
It is often said that the way you spend the first 2 hours after waking up sets the tone of your day. A great morning routine that includes some of your best activities (maybe journaling, reading, exercising, praying) will help set a good tone for your day.
3. Exercise
Another form of self-love is exercising. Doing the right exercises for your body helps to keep you in good shape which in turn builds your confidence.
4. Affirmations
There is power in your tongue. Have you seen people who are big fans of self-love? They are those that affirm themselves, they constantly speak and write down the type of future they desire for themselves.
5. Volunteering
Volunteering is a way to render your help and time for the betterment of a cause, some people/ community. Being able to volunteer for different organizations helps you feel significant and useful to yourself and your community.
6. Giving: This is just like volunteering, but this has to do with more of letting go of the things you have that you know you have not been using or will be of use to others. Doing this in all sincerity will not only give you joy but also serves as a way of self-loving.
7. Eating a Balanced Diet
What goes into your body has the ability to determine how you feel. Eating a balanced diet which is not necessarily something extravagant will be a sure way to self-love.
8. Respond to people in a positive way
The way you relate with the people around you has a lot of effect of you. If someone offends you, the way you respond or react to the person will also have an adverse effect on your mood. Choosing to respond positively irrespective of the action of people towards you is one of the best ways to self-love.
9. Pray: No matter your religion, you can show yourself love by spending time to the God you believe in. Prayer has a way of strengthening and building confidence in you. Making prayer a conscious and unconscious way of life is very important as it not only gives you a certain level of confidence but it brings peace that helps you to love yourself and and everyone around you.
10. Have Fun
Some of us get soo busy that we run throughout the year without taking timeout to have fun, spend time alone and with loved ones. A very good decision you can make today is to self-love by taking time off work and other tasking activities and spend time with your friends, family and loved ones.
You Only Live Once, So Live. YOLO
Conclusion
With all these been said, take note that a person who does not see a need to celebrate his small wins will find it hard to do that for others because he will see it as not important. Someone who does not have personal values will see no reason to love others by respecting their values.
Be true to yourself by showing yourself love and learning how to love yourself before starting a relationship so that you can make things easier for yourself and your partner.
Today, choose to love yourself without guilt.
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