Goals, Purpose and Relationship

We would expect that the president of a country would never want to sleep  a bridge- Why? Because He is the president, why sleep under a bridge when he can afford to buy a house just for the night? In the same vein, an average person will want nothing but a great relationship with friends, families, coworkers, and most especially with their partners because, who would want less? But having a great relationship will require nothing but great work, commitment, and sacrifice.

Before anyone gets entangled in the relationship web, there are certain things you need to know and the most important of them all is the need to know who you are and what you want to achieve in life/in your relationship. 

Below is an illustration I so much love using anytime I get the chance to, because it does justice to what we are discussing.

Imagine a man that is on his way to swim and he gets the chance to pick someone to accompany him, and out of the three people he was presented with, there's one dressed like he is going to hike, another like he is going for an official meeting and the third like he is going to the beach. He would be considered unwise if he picks any of the first two but smart if he settles for the one dressed in a beachwear. However, the fact that the person is dressed in his beachwear doesn’t mean he is going to the beach to swim; he might just be going to enjoy nature which makes him inappropriate to accompany the man. The message I am trying to pass with this scenario is that- on your journey to having a great relationship, you need to choose the person that runs in line with your purpose.

But what happens if one does not even know the purpose of his existence? He would have chosen just any of the three, done what that person is doing and he would have successfully wasted quality time, probably more than he should have because he was  running with another person's purpose.

This also affects our relationship, how?

Take for instance a lady who wants to have a relationship (that will lead to marriage) with a 'God-fearing' man who will support her in all she does. It will be wrong for her to say yes to a man that does not believe in God nor goes to church, or a man that doesn’t see the good in what people do or never thinks of the future of their relationship. Why? Because she knows what she wants and if she does contrary to that, she will be making a great mistake. But even at that, finding a man that has all qualities at the first contact does not mean that he is the right person for her. 

The fact that she knows what she wants will guide her in making the first decision, and this goes for us all. There is a need to know what we want out of our relationship before we consider starting one. We must think of the circumstances surrounding us and the things that we want to work towards with our partner; if the person one is thinking of dating does not have any of these qualities or work in line with any of these, that might be a call to calm down and go easy.

To be continued…