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How to Know

Remember that man that wants to swim and the lady seeking a Godly relationship from the last post? Yes… They had something in common and that is recognizing the goal, they knew what they wanted. I asked a question in the last post “what happens if one does not know the purpose of his existence?”. What happens if we don’t know? If you are reading this post and you are single, I will like to say congratulations because you are really lucky (you have the time to discover yourself), but if you are already married, or courting/dating, I say to you, it is not too late at all to know the reason for your existence.

How then do I know?

Permit me to refer to the scriptures, Matthew 22:37-39 explains the connection between having a relationship with God and having a relationship with a man. There

e has to exist in you a connection with your greater self, you need to know yourself and the only way to do this is to connect with God so that He will open you up and help you see that unique purpose of your existence, he will help you to know what to look out for in your life and relationship. It is only when you can connect with God and connect with yourself, will you be able to connect with others in the right way because you can only love someone at the level that you love yourself.  Discovering yourself then requires respecting yourself, loving yourself, and knowing your core values.

To all my single folks, this is the time to discover yourself, don’t be in a rush to enter into a relationship that you will end up regretting and rushing out of. You need to know yourself and this period of singleness is the best time you have. You need to take your time to build a relationship with God so that He will show you things that are hidden about you but can be a stumbling block or a rising stone to you in your future relationship and then he will show you how to make good use of them. Do not be pressured because you are still single and all your friends are in a relationship or are engaged. The point is not in being engaged nor being in a relationship but knowing how to sail the boat when you are in it, what then happens is, you don’t have what it takes to be a sailor, but you still decide to sail the boat of relationship? Nothing but disaster happens. This means before you decide to sail a boat you need to have understood what it takes to be a sailor, understand how life on a boat works, water flow/current, different weather, and what wave-type comes with them. It is the same in a relationship, you have to build yourself to be ready for the relationship and then be aware of the does and don’ts in a relationship so that when you finally get into one you won’t regret it.

Imagine you go into a relationship without knowing what you want from life or the relationship or you build all your relationship goals on mere fantasies (just like the Disney princesses happily ever after stories) and you enter a relationship with someone just like you. The both of you will wake up one day to regret deciding on entering into that relationship, why? Because it is not as you envisioned it to be, and that is because you envisioned it wrongly because you didn’t prepare yourselves for the responsibility that comes with being in a relationship. As much as you what to mingle try to know what you want out of it (relationship), know yourself, and work on yourself by having a relationship with God first and then with yourself.


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