How to Differentiate Between Infatuation and Love?

For the past couple of days, we have been talking about Salewa and her relationship. At the end of the story yesterday I asked a question. Is Salewa truly in LOVE or is she just INFATUATED with Kola? In case you don’t get who, these people are, you can check the previous posts here and here. Today, it will be giving an answer to the question that I asked but before that, let’s get familiar with the terms Infatuation and Love.

According to the Merriam- Webster dictionary:

Infatuation is a feeling of foolish or very strong love or admiration for someone or something. A feeling of foolish or obsessively strong love for, admiration for, or interest in someone or something.

Love on the other hand is a feeling of strong or constant affection for a person. It is a strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties.

From the definitions above, one can tell that both feelings are strong and it is easy for some people to mix them up but in today’s post, we will be looking into what differentiates these two terms while we refer to Salewa’s story as an example. I didn’t want to bore you with Salewa’s story but she continued her life like that always visiting Kola, calling him over and over, and getting mad at him when you reach out to him and he refuses to respond. We can say Salewa is obsessed with Kola. Anyone in Salewa’s shoes can say they are in love but I will say they are only infatuating.

What makes what you are feeling Love?

You can say one is truly in love when you have seen past the physical appearance of that person. When you meet a lady or a guy and you get closer then try to learn more about what she or he likes, when you become friends with the person and you get to notice their values to a good extent and you still decide to move deeper with the person, then that can be said to be love. Love is a choice you make irrespective of all odds. When the lady is imperfect but you decide to walk with her through her journey to getting better- that is love. Love requires patience and a lot of understanding.

Infatuation?

Infatuation on the other hand is the love of external features. As the above definition states, it is foolish and obsessive. It is dangerous. Another word for this is Crush. This is what Salewa was feeling all along thinking she was in love. All she knows about Kola is that he is tall, dark, handsome, and is well built. She also knows where he lives but this information is not enough for her to cook up a love story for herself. This feeling does not last because they are based on qualities that will fade away with time and as time goes on, the feeling will also fade away.

Most people find ways to justify their feeling as love when it is infatuation. I believe that with what you have learned through Salewa’s story, you will be able to tell yourself if you are truly in love or if you are just infatuating. See you tomorrow. I love you and remember always that love is beautiful and we can nurture it together.